Monday, August 11, 2014

When Friends Become Mere Acquaintances

Alan and I were having a talk the other day, where we were discussing who we still talk or hangout with and the same things come up. As we grow up, there are people that are no longer in our lives, some are by choice and some relationships just grow apart.

Let’s start with the first one, people who do not share the same lifestyle. This is difficult because it is not that you do not get a long or they are negative; you just don’t have a lot in common anymore. When you are working full-time and the other is in school, your schedules and priorities are different. Someone that is working has a strict routine, where someone who is studying is dependent on their class schedule and time management of studying. As hard as it is to admit, it is easier spending time with someone that has the same schedule of either in school or working a 9 to 5. I noticed this when arranging a time to catch-up with a friend becomes difficult. Coffee dates or brunches can often be arranged, but you change each day and relationships grow apart. This is a harsh reality we have to accept. Some friendships stick and some don’t.

And lastly, the kind of people that are toxic and not a positive effect in your life. I myself learned this the hard way because I value relationships that I’ve built, but there are times I’ve noticed I tend to complain about a person more than I should. How do we know if we have this person? They are the people that don’t simply make you happy or a better person. We all have this person, yet we keep them around so no one feels offended. They are not bad people who we should immediately run away from. However, as we grow older into our 20’s and 30’s we realize time is precious and every moment is an opportunity and an investment, and opportunities and investments should be made very wisely.

My patience and tolerance for trivial matters have exponentially plunged over the years and I am no longer interested in what others think of me or unnecessary drama. My time and energy can be used to people that genuinely have my best interest at heart, my ambitions and my pursuit for a better future. This is very important because toxic friends are the deadliest. We need to decide for ourselves which people are valuable and worth the investment and ones that should be removed for good. It is not your responsibility to keep others happy. Your responsibility is your happiness, your dreams, and your life. My mom taught me this at young age, “You need to love and take care of yourself. That’s only person who will have your back after I die. No one else. So love yourself.” So let go of friends, acquaintances and people who are not a positive representation of yourself. Those who stick around are the only ones that matter.

Sunday, July 6, 2014

Great Spots for Unique Ice-Cream Flavors in the Bay Area

Since it is national ice-cream month, I thought I’d make a list of ice cream parlors that are unique to the San Francisco Bay Area. Please feel free to add your flavor recommendations!

1) Ici Berkeley, CA Ici (Pronounced “Ee-cee”, French for over here or here): This is my first and favorite ice cream in the bay area. Although I enjoy fruity flavors and sherbets from Marco Polo, Ici has my heart. From the best flavor yet, earl grey to their richer flavors candied bacon, the quality of their ice cream is superb. It ties in a lot of what Berkeley represents. A little bit of hipster, sophistication, and freshness.
  • Rose
  • Earl Grey
2) Bi-Rite San Francisco, CA: A San Francisco classic. Not much you can complain about other than a line that wraps around the block. The location is prime. Located right in front of Dolores Park, you can enjoy the sun/fog (or lack the of) while slurping double scoops of salted caramel. It is the one of the best, you have to try it. It differentiates from the other salted caramel because there is a hint of bitterness, confusing your palette of espresso. So good! With walks around the park and cone from Bi-Rite, sounds like a panty-droppin’ date to me.
  • Salted Caramel
  • Roasted Banana
3) Smitten San Francisco, CA: By far the cutest name for an ice-cream parlor. Smitten, the first steps into infatuation; maybe a little of puppy love. Something like puppies running the field of wheat. When I get smitten (:-)), I like to take the classic route. Classic Vanilla will always be a hit!
  • Tcho chocolate
  • Classic Vanilla 
4) Humphry Slocombe San Francisco, CA: The bougie-est ice cream parlor you can ask for. Located in Hayes Valley, I always feel like I am in another part of town even though it is only 10 minutes away from the Financial District. For the flavors, they definitely have ice cream on the decadent side, but not too creamy where you become overwhelmed. I am a javaholic and nothing can beat either blue bottle or Vietnamese Coffee. When it is both? Oh my goodness! It cannot get any better!
  • Vietnamese Coffee (aka ca phe sua da)
  • Carrot Mango
5) Marco Polo San Francisco, CA: Finally an ice cream spot that has exotic flavors, I have a weakness for exotic fruits like mangosteen, soursop, jackfruit, etc. I love them all, dare I say even durian?  They are CASHONLY, since it’s totally a mom n’ pop shop. Support your local businesses. My two favorite are:
  • Mangosteen
  • Taro

Thursday, June 26, 2014

Socially Awkward

In continuum to my article in September of valuing communication, I wanted to disclose a very emotional conversation I’ve had with my coworker. We talked about the difference of writing words and expressing/saying words. Words seem so simple when you read it, but when it is said out loud, it hold so much more meaning. You can either sense the passiveness of speech or feel the genuine kindness.

With this day and age of technology, our lives are shortened and simplified by a simple text or email. In the old days, the thought of talking on the phone was pure luxury. You weren’t allowed to give your number out because you might get in trouble from your parents. You would have to wait your turn in speaking on the phone because either 1) someone is on the other line or 2) dial-up internet. Now that technology is so advanced, you are able to send essays to your friends via SMS.

This side of technology is although great in the sense that it makes lives convenient, but at the same time, it makes people lose their speech. We seem to avoid making the phone call thus creating the terminology of “socially awkward”. To my knowledge that being awkward didn’t really exist until modern day, and to my understanding that lack of human interaction is what cause social awkwardness. We are too confined to the simplistic ways to converse that we’ve forgotten how we all used to do it causing human interaction to extinction.

Is it old fashioned for me of needing to see the other person while talking to them? Being able to see the movements in the arms, the connection in their eyes and hear the wavelengths in their tone. It feels different.

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

20 Bars to try in San Francisco

Since I'll be in San Francisco more often, I've made a list of bars in San Francisco that are unique. Check indicates I've been to them this year. My goal is try all 20!

  1. Candy Bar ✓
  2. Local Edition✓
  3. Absinthe Brasserie & Bar
  4. Jones✓
  5. District ✓
  6. Press Club✓
  7. Sugar Café 
  8. Novela
  9. Alchemist
  10. Carbo
  11. The View ✓
  12. Bourbon & Branch
  13. The Monk’s Kettle
  14. 83 Proof
  15. Crimsom
  16. Chambers Eat+ Drink
  17. The Living Room Bar & Lounge
  18. 1300 on Fillmore
  19. Rye
  20. Palomino ✓


Hiatus: a break or interruption in the continuity of a work, series,

  • Origin:155565; < Latin hiātus opening, gap, equivalent to hiā ( re ) to gape, open + -tus suffix of v. action.

I cannot recall how two months went by extremely fast and extremely slow at the same time. Fast in the sense that I was not consistent in posting two entries per month; slow in the sense my job hunting and process took a bit of an overlay in my life.

I indeed took a hiatus in writing.

However, I am back. As I was self-consciously reading my blog over the weekend, I felt an overwhelming sense of nostalgia. The fulfillment of expressing my anger, the pride in expressing my wisdom (or lack thereof), and lastly the happiness of just putting words I learned since birth into coherent prose.

Writing will always be in me; I love writing.

The simple phrase of “do what you love” is extremely underrated. The pure bliss and delight that comes from it is indescribable.

I think know I have found something more than income. I’ve found what I am capable of doing and what I'm meant to do.

Life is way too short to focus on money, tangible things, making others happy. Carpe Diem, make yourself happy.