Sunday, May 17, 2015

Don't Let Spontaneity Be Your Enemy

One of my favorite things about human interaction is having intellectual and heartfelt conversations. It definitely opens your mind to a wider spectrum of ideas and lessons that truly inspiring. Today my coworker and I had a little chat about one thing that we as humans are most afraid of, getting hurt. In romantic relationships, getting hurt is something we want to avoid and don’t want to feel. We guard out emotions and tuck our hearts further into our sleeves to simply avoid the fear of being crushed. Playing it safe is the default plan. But when we will ever stop playing safe, and take the leap, risk the chances, break the rules?

I don’t know which is worse, realizing that you’ve invested in nothing, that this was all an elaborate web that stings you in the end. Or understanding that you betrayed your feelings, feelings that you could’ve sworn weren’t so ephemeral.

It’s about not being who you feel like you have to be. Love can disappear while you’re sleeping. Sometimes you get it back and sometimes you don’t. The point is to not be scared of it while it’s there. Although love is amazing and everyone claims to want it, true love can actually be fucking terrifying and overwhelming. The best thing you can do for yourself though is not let your fears rob you of something truly special. My coworker said to me, “You shouldn’t be afraid, it is apart of life.” It is true. I rather feel hurt than to feel regret. Be brave, be bold, and take risks! Getting hurt is apart life. It is a learning experience that we all go through, maybe more than once, however don’t let it prevent you from going after the happiness you deserve. Don’t let spontaneity be your enemy.

If you don’t take risks, your life will forever stay the same, which is fine if you prefer it that way. You don’t want to have to deal with any unexpected twists and turns, any switches in the narrative. You find great comfort in the familiar, even though the familiar is actually what’s killing you. You are wrapping your arms around the very thing that’s going to cheat you out of everything. Understand this though: you are missing out. You are missing out on everything that makes a life worthwhile. You are missing out on joy, excitement, despair, mistakes that are necessary for you to make.

Saturday, January 31, 2015

Security

When I think of this word I think of two people/things:

1) Bonquiqui

2) Security, as a state of being. In the past two years, I developed the most confidence and feel the most secure in my choices and in who I am. I noticed that insecurity is a stepping stone that we all have in common no matter how beautiful, smart or successful we are. Assuming that most of my readers are in the 20's, I wanna encourage that you are young and beautiful, spend your time constructively and don't allow it to sink into self-doubt and anxiety. It prevents you from finding self-love and acceptance that you deserve. From getting lost in which direction to take with our careers to purposing delaying text message to the people we like, we are in the most exciting decade of our lives. Choose to make yourself happy and love yourself the most! What is holding us back from finding sense of serenity? We are always caught of what others are thinking of us, but at the same time we are too focused on ourselves to judge other people. I would like to dedicate this post to all of my friends, you don't get enough compliments. So here are some compliments!!! Spread the love and compliment someone today! I separated this list between compliments for guys and girls. So these are my genuine words to make you smile. Have a great weekend!

For my ladies,

1. You are prettier than Princess Jasmine and wiser than Hilary Clinton.

2. You are that kind of woman that makes other women step their game up.

3. You are the true example of the finer things in life.


For the fellas,

1. You bewilder me with your intelligence, amaze me your kindness, and inspire me to be a better person.

2. I guess when you are young you just believe that there will be many people with whom you’ll connect with. Later in life, you realize it only happens a few times. You, you're one in a million.

3. If I was girlfriend...I'd never let you go. (Sorry, Justin Bieber made me cheat)

Friday, January 30, 2015

We are the Owners of our Voices

Exactly 2 years ago, I created this writing project to document and share my experiences, my thoughts and my pure enjoyment of writing. From entries of Food & Travel to a broader aspect, Relationships. Whenever I reread my post I feel overjoyed. I remember exactly how my I felt when I was writing the post, my thought process—I was so passionate.

It felt like work to me because I wanted to present my best work, but at the same time I loved it so much I don’t mind pushing 10+ hours for. My most popular post is actually my About Me section. More people are interested in who I am than what I write about. Second most popular post is the Power of Expression, I described how expression is so much more powerful than knowledge. You can have all the knowledge in the world, but if you are not able to create something with that knowledge, it doesn’t mean a thing.

Through my 7-8 month absence, (most due to long hours of of my new job) I doubted myself many times if I am in the right industry. Although I am not in love my job, I do find it extremely worth doing because I am adopting new skills and tools that I've never been exposed to. It definitely makes me sharper, a better problem solver, and gives me the confidence and initiative to take other obstacles down our company's pipeline. It is a challenge having to learn a entirely different industry but I feel very fortunate given that I have no background.

From working in healthcare, then pursuing legal services, then recruited personally to private finance. I learned that career choices isn't the only place you can "find your calling" or "create change". Passion can come from your hobbies and your desire to make a difference. I don't know know if my writing is making a difference, but i know for sure fact my voice is. We are the owners of our voices.

Time will give me hiccups here and there but something I'll never stop is writing and sharing my voice to my family and friends whenever they need it. I hope this breaks the ice in many beliefs that passion can be in any part of your life, not necessary your career. Do MANY things, and affect MANY change.

Monday, August 11, 2014

When Friends Become Mere Acquaintances

Alan and I were having a talk the other day, where we were discussing who we still talk or hangout with and the same things come up. As we grow up, there are people that are no longer in our lives, some are by choice and some relationships just grow apart.

Let’s start with the first one, people who do not share the same lifestyle. This is difficult because it is not that you do not get a long or they are negative; you just don’t have a lot in common anymore. When you are working full-time and the other is in school, your schedules and priorities are different. Someone that is working has a strict routine, where someone who is studying is dependent on their class schedule and time management of studying. As hard as it is to admit, it is easier spending time with someone that has the same schedule of either in school or working a 9 to 5. I noticed this when arranging a time to catch-up with a friend becomes difficult. Coffee dates or brunches can often be arranged, but you change each day and relationships grow apart. This is a harsh reality we have to accept. Some friendships stick and some don’t.

And lastly, the kind of people that are toxic and not a positive effect in your life. I myself learned this the hard way because I value relationships that I’ve built, but there are times I’ve noticed I tend to complain about a person more than I should. How do we know if we have this person? They are the people that don’t simply make you happy or a better person. We all have this person, yet we keep them around so no one feels offended. They are not bad people who we should immediately run away from. However, as we grow older into our 20’s and 30’s we realize time is precious and every moment is an opportunity and an investment, and opportunities and investments should be made very wisely.

My patience and tolerance for trivial matters have exponentially plunged over the years and I am no longer interested in what others think of me or unnecessary drama. My time and energy can be used to people that genuinely have my best interest at heart, my ambitions and my pursuit for a better future. This is very important because toxic friends are the deadliest. We need to decide for ourselves which people are valuable and worth the investment and ones that should be removed for good. It is not your responsibility to keep others happy. Your responsibility is your happiness, your dreams, and your life. My mom taught me this at young age, “You need to love and take care of yourself. That’s only person who will have your back after I die. No one else. So love yourself.” So let go of friends, acquaintances and people who are not a positive representation of yourself. Those who stick around are the only ones that matter.

Sunday, July 6, 2014

Great Spots for Unique Ice-Cream Flavors in the Bay Area

Since it is national ice-cream month, I thought I’d make a list of ice cream parlors that are unique to the San Francisco Bay Area. Please feel free to add your flavor recommendations!

1) Ici Berkeley, CA Ici (Pronounced “Ee-cee”, French for over here or here): This is my first and favorite ice cream in the bay area. Although I enjoy fruity flavors and sherbets from Marco Polo, Ici has my heart. From the best flavor yet, earl grey to their richer flavors candied bacon, the quality of their ice cream is superb. It ties in a lot of what Berkeley represents. A little bit of hipster, sophistication, and freshness.
  • Rose
  • Earl Grey
2) Bi-Rite San Francisco, CA: A San Francisco classic. Not much you can complain about other than a line that wraps around the block. The location is prime. Located right in front of Dolores Park, you can enjoy the sun/fog (or lack the of) while slurping double scoops of salted caramel. It is the one of the best, you have to try it. It differentiates from the other salted caramel because there is a hint of bitterness, confusing your palette of espresso. So good! With walks around the park and cone from Bi-Rite, sounds like a panty-droppin’ date to me.
  • Salted Caramel
  • Roasted Banana
3) Smitten San Francisco, CA: By far the cutest name for an ice-cream parlor. Smitten, the first steps into infatuation; maybe a little of puppy love. Something like puppies running the field of wheat. When I get smitten (:-)), I like to take the classic route. Classic Vanilla will always be a hit!
  • Tcho chocolate
  • Classic Vanilla 
4) Humphry Slocombe San Francisco, CA: The bougie-est ice cream parlor you can ask for. Located in Hayes Valley, I always feel like I am in another part of town even though it is only 10 minutes away from the Financial District. For the flavors, they definitely have ice cream on the decadent side, but not too creamy where you become overwhelmed. I am a javaholic and nothing can beat either blue bottle or Vietnamese Coffee. When it is both? Oh my goodness! It cannot get any better!
  • Vietnamese Coffee (aka ca phe sua da)
  • Carrot Mango
5) Marco Polo San Francisco, CA: Finally an ice cream spot that has exotic flavors, I have a weakness for exotic fruits like mangosteen, soursop, jackfruit, etc. I love them all, dare I say even durian?  They are CASHONLY, since it’s totally a mom n’ pop shop. Support your local businesses. My two favorite are:
  • Mangosteen
  • Taro